Huffington Post Blog: Men Who Work On Themselves Are Sexy

“I’m a feminist who loves men. Not only do I appreciate the beauty of the male physique and the intoxicating power of masculine energy–I value the ways in which men process emotions, relationships, and life differently than women.

I’ve had the deep honor and privilege of counseling hundreds of men (if not more) over the past 20 years. In my opinion, (in general) men are more rational, logical and linear in their thinking, decisive, direct, and more self-oriented than women. I see this as a normal result of nature and nurture. I have harvested great wisdom from my male clients (and hope to have taught them a thing or two…)

I notice (again, in general) that I exercise different clinical muscles with my male clients than my female clients. With women, I am often empathizing, supporting, and building them up in preparation for self-actualization. With men, I find that I am chipping through a wall of defensiveness that prevents them from connecting with their authentic self and having deeper connections with others. Again, I attribute this to nature (DNA) and nurture (psychosocial experiences.)

In the past, men were expected to be unfailing and to know it all. That is no longer a working paradigm because it’s unfair. I’m excited to live during a time that these gender roles are converging. Women are allowed to be strong and men are allowed to be sensitive. Subsequently, humanity will evolve, God willing…

Men and women are equal partners in humanity. Times are changing from a traditional division of life roles to something more balanced and evolved. Researchers say that androgynous (high masculine and high feminine) personality types are the healthiest. This means that healthy men and women possess positive traditionally masculine traits (confidence, decisiveness, assertiveness, directness, etc.) and traditionally feminine traits (empathy, thoughtfulness, insight, compassion, etc.)

One of my girlfriends who is raising sons said, ‘I feel sad for boys. They do not have the same resources as girls to express their feelings and receive support.’ This is true and this needs to change.

Therefore, I love when I see men seek the following”

Read the full article here

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