I am really passionate about what I call “mental wealth,” which refers to having both inner peace and prosperity. I believe all of us are seeking the whole package—mind, body fitness, and financial success. Having inner peace and prosperity is the key. I love that term.
Now, speaking about inner peace, you just flew in from Florida where it’s much warmer. Oh my goodness, and you came straight to the radio station. Do you remember the first time we were on air together?
Yes, I do! I made you stand in a hobby shop and talk about the benefits of having a hobby.
Yes, at Tom’s Thumb in 2010 in Evanston! I talked about how important leisure is, and I know you’re so good with your crafts. I believe in work-life balance, absolutely.
Absolutely! After 20 years of practicing as a psychotherapist, I feel like I’ve really discovered the keys to having both inner peace and prosperity. As a CEO, I built Urban Balance, which I started when I first met you. I think at that time, I had just a couple of therapists, but now there are over a hundred therapists working from ten locations in three states. I successfully sold the business last year.
As I was working on my business and myself, I started realizing that when clients work on their self-esteem, it affects their net worth. Self-worth and net worth are connected. Your mental health is related to your money.
Yes, absolutely. I believe we all set ceilings for ourselves with our limiting beliefs. If we can expand our thinking, we can earn more money. When I first started my practice, I had coffee with my friend Steve, who was also starting his practice as a psychologist. He asked me how much I wanted to make, and I said it would be great if I could make sixty thousand dollars. He said, “Sixty? I want to make over a hundred!” I asked if he thought that was possible, and he said absolutely. That year, I made sixty, and Steve made over a hundred.
Because you set your goal. Your mindset was limiting yourself.
Exactly. I was limiting myself, but I changed that. So many people listening right now might think, “But my boss is only going to give me a one percent raise. How am I going to make more money?” How do we change that mindset?
We need to embrace the abundance theory, which says there are unlimited opportunities available to us. You’re only thinking about your current job, but you’re not thinking about potential side businesses, future ventures, or other opportunities to welcome abundance into your life. Maybe it’s an Airbnb, or maybe you’ll start something new. If you start thinking of yourself as a success, you will become a success. It’s about shifting your thinking. Cognitive behavioral therapy teaches us that our thoughts precede our emotions and behaviors, so we have to shift how we think about ourselves. We need to detach from fear.
Yes, but it’s so hard to get out of our comfort zones. That inner critic, the one in your head that says, “You’re not good enough.” How do we silence that?
That inner critic is the “roommate” that lives with you, and a big part of therapy is learning to silence it. Instead, we need to choose to become our greatest and most compassionate advocate. I believe it’s about detaching from ego. Some people think you need ego to make money, but I believe ego can actually hurt us. We need to connect with our essence—our authentic selves, our light. When we shine our light, we succeed in the world and help others shine as well.
You have a clinical background, but you’re also talking about detaching from ego and connecting with the self. Did you always have this belief, or did you blend the two over time?
I think it’s been a blend of both. After 20 years of practice, I started seeing patterns across all my clients. Whether they came from different cultures, religions, or socioeconomic backgrounds, there are universal truths. We all have egos as part of the human condition, but if we can separate from them, we can live a much greater life. I always say that love is the currency of life. If we can lovingly connect with ourselves and others, we welcome abundance and success.
I love that. Does that align with your other concept of “karmic kindness”?
Yes, absolutely. When I work with clients, I first help them become aware of how we all unconsciously recreate what’s familiar until we choose something better. The next step is addressing their thinking—turning down the volume on that inner critic and opening themselves to abundance. Therapy also focuses on empathy and compassion. By honoring their feelings, they come to know themselves on a deeper level, and they carry that compassion with them moving forward.
That karmic kindness is something we can all lift each other up with. I wouldn’t have achieved what I have without the kindness of others. After 20 years of practice, public speaking, blogging, and entrepreneurship, I know that none of it would have been possible without the support I received.
Exactly. We all lift each other up, and our minds are the best virtual reality machines. Whatever we believe is happening in our brain shapes our reality.
That’s so true. My best friend always says I have “psychotic optimism” because I’m so positive, and things come to fruition through self-fulfilling prophecies.
You’re amazing. You should write a book!
I’m working on it! It’s called Mental Wealth, and I’m pitching it to a publisher in New York next week. Wish me luck!
I wish you all the luck. We’d love to have you back to talk more about Mental Wealth. This concept is so powerful, and we need more of it in the world.
Thank you so much. I’d love that!
