“Change is pivotal in therapy. In fact, it’s the reason people seek professional help in the first place, according to Deborah Serani, Psy.D, a clinicial psychologist and author of the book Living with Depression. Sometimes, they want to change themselves. Other times they yearn to change others.
‘I’m still surprised at the number of people who come to therapy to learn how to get someone else to change,’ said Ryan Howes, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist and author of the popular blog ‘In Therapy.’ ‘They want to know how to get their boss to talk to them differently, or want their wife to appreciate them more, or want their friends to be more considerate.’
Of course the only person you can change is yourself. That includes changing your beliefs, behaviors, reactions and patterns. As therapistJoyce Marter, LCPC, said, ‘In therapy, change may mean letting go of dysfunctional relationship patterns, irrational beliefs and self-sabotaging behaviors and then replacing them with a more positive, conscious and proactive mode of operation that leads to greater happiness, wellness and success.'”